Urban Word Wednesday: Vagancy

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Vagancy (pronounced vaj-ancy): A portmanteau of the words “Vagina” and “Vacancy” meaning a vacant vagina.

Examples Of Use:

While down in the Dominican Republic on vacation, hubby and love to people watch and we like to have a little fun while at it! We were lying on our beach chairs with some friends (and strangers alike) around when hubby spotted a woman….ummm…really working on her tan.

Hubby: wowzers – will you look at that?

Me: what?

*hubby gives a nudge to look towards the water*

Me: well now…that’s confidence! At least she won’t have those smiley-face tan lines when she bends over.

Hubby: posed like that, it looks like she’s advertising a vagancy.

Me: well, she’s definitely putting it all out there.

Friends: ok, what in God’s name in a vagancy?

Hubby: you know, availability in the vagina.

Friends: OMG – seriously? You two are whacked.

Hubby and I: we know!

I know you’ve all got stories about women overtly displaying their vagancy…come on…share the wealth…

More blog deliciousness here:

  • Near died reading The Oatmeal’s horrible cards. RIOT! Sadly, I could use some of these.
  • Elena Aitken’s guest post on Leanne Shirtliffe’s blog with the top 10 signs Mom needs a vacation had me keeling over in giggles.
  • Ever gone toe to toe with raccoons? OMG loved K.B. Owen’s post on the little furry bandits and all the stories everyone had to share.
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Urban Word Wednesday: Turdburglar

Oh and pssstttt…I am also guest posting today over at Myndi Shafer’s on my love of beauty pageants so be sure to drop by for a visit! I’d love to connect with you there. 

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Turdburglar: An annoying person who rudely interrupts you while taking a dump by either knocking on the stall door or attempting to open it.

Examples Of Use:

As most of you know, hubby and I were down south for the last two weeks enjoying a lovely, most romantic vacation together. There was lots of hand holding, kissing, staring into each other’s eyes for what seemed like hours lost in the wonderment of our love…and there was turdburgling to keep us grounded in urban word reality!

I was in the bathroom enjoying a quiet morning read when all of a sudden hubby strolls in.

Me: excuse me????

*looking all horrified*

Hubby: what?

Me: ummmm….a little privacy please?

Hubby: oh, I’m sorry, are you pooing? I thought you were just doing number 1. Sorry.

*quickly making his exit*

Me (hollering): you are a total turdburglar! Now I can’t go. Everything’s locked up like fort knox. You’ve terrified my turd. It totally has stage fright now. Great!

Hubby: sorry honey!! Well…maybe the urge will come back later. Can I come back in and finish my hair?

Me: might as well….

Ever been attacked by a turdburglar? Come on….Share the wealth…

More blog deliciousness here:

Urban Word Wednesday: Phone-yawn

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Phone-yawn: The act of taking out a cell phone from one’s pocket or purse, resulting in other people in the vicinity taking out and checking their phones as well.

Examples Of Use:

Hubby and I went out to lunch before heading off to Punta Cana. I thought the waitress was going to die laughing as she stumbled over to get our orders and caught the tail end of this convo.

Hubby: why is it that every time I even glance at my blackberry, you have to haul yours out? I was only going to be 2 seconds and you take forever because you always fall into the blogosphere never to return.

Me: baby…I can’t help it! It’s a phone-yawn!

Hubby: a phone-yawn? What in God’s name is that?

Me: well you know how a yawn in contagious. You see someone yawning and BAM, you start yawning? It’s the same thing but applies to cell phones, blackberries etc. I see you pull out yours, regardless of how long, I suddenly gotta check mine! If you’d rather I didn’t check mine, don’t check yours.

Hubby: I am unsubscribing you from the urban dictionary. I can’t take it anymore.

Me: oh stop…You know you love it and you know it’s true!

Hubby: damn…why are you always right?

Me: I’m a woman….just sayin’!

Have you experienced a phone-yawn? Now that you think about it, doesn’t it totally happen all the time? Share your phone-yawn stories…


P.S. Remember, hubby and I are on vacation until April 23, 2012 but have fun and talk amongst yourselves!

More blog deliciousness here:

Urban Word Wednesday: Glamping

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Glamping (a most beloved portmanteau): Shorthand for glamorous camping; luxury camping. It’s like regular camping but with nicer things than usual, being warmer, and more comfortable.

Examples Of Use:

Hubby and I were doing some shopping at Canadian Tire when I struck gold.

Me: OMG! It’s perfect. I can’t wait to go glamping with this treasure!

Hubby: glamping?!?

Me: you know…DUH….glamour camping!

Hubby: I should have known if there was such a thing, you’d find it.

Me: I am totally taken that as a compliment!

Me: don’t you think this stainless steel wine glass says rustic, glamour? It’s glamping baby. It’s our new camping style! Consider it like an upgrade…

Hubby: I must say, it suits you perfectly!

Me: I know, doesn’t it?!?! I think I’ll bedazzle it with some hot pink rhinestones to really glamp it up!

Hubby: that’d be swell – can you make me one in blue?

Me: absolutely…and I found you a little glamping treasure I think you’ll love. I mean, you know I wouldn’t want you to feel left out. How about THIS for cooking up our yummies while we are roughing it?

Hubby: that’s certainly an upgrade to our frying pan over an open fire. I could adjust…I think I’m gonna like glamping!!!  

What’s your camping style? Would you go glamping? What other glamping gems have you seen that are “must haves”?


P.S. Remember, hubby and I are on vacation until April 23, 2012 but have fun and talk amongst yourselves!

More blog deliciousness here:

Urban Word Wednesday: Vacationitis

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Vacationitis: The lack of concern for any of one’s responsibilities in the days (or weeks, or months) leading up to a vacation. Physical symptoms include the wearing of capris and jeans at work, flip-flops, or Uggs, and a lack of makeup or grooming. Dishes begin piling up in the sink, and the afflicted’s response to most questions is: “Uh, I’ll worry about that later.” Can happen as early as the date of vacation planning, or as late as the hours before the flight leaves.

Examples Of Use:

Hubby: so what’s on tap for Wednesday’s post this week? More of our sexual conversations, bedroom exploits, noon-hour rendez-vous, or shopping expeditions? Is nothing sacred between us any more????

Me: oh hubby, stop it, you know you love it! But no, I am afraid I will be disappointing you and our fans. I’ve got a terrible case of vacationitis!

Hubby: what!?!?!?

Me: given that we are flying out IN 12 HOURS for our 2-week vacay in Punta Cana, I can’t concentrate on anything…blog…work…urban word fun…it’s all totally escaped me. I am mush!

Hubby: well I can’t say as I blame you. I can’t concentrate on anything but grabbing our suitcases and flying outta here! Ola Punta Cana!

Me: knowing my readers, they’ll forgive our little bout of vacationitis!

Yip, you read it correctly – hubby and I are flying out of here for a little FUN in the SUN!! We are going to be in Punta Cana for the next two weeks. Squeeee!

No worries, I have the ever fabulous Jessica O’Neal swinging by for a guest post on Monday (squeeeee…thank you Jessica) and I have a few more surprises in store for you while we are away.

I hope y’all will continue to make yourselves at home here! Talk amongst yourselves, frolic in the comments, blogjack one another, enjoy shameless self-promoting, and have an all around party!!! I’ve taken the “first-comment” moderation off so all hell could very well break loose…FUN….have at er’ and let the good times roll.

I will catch up in person upon my return April 23, 2012! Till then…have fun everyone…I will miss you but will console myself with girlie drinks on the beach as I say “cheers” in each of your honor!!!

Have you ever suffered from vacationitis? How you stay focused when you are so close to jet setting to your vacation destination?

Urban Word Wednesday: Spark in my ass

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Spark in my ass: A sudden burst of positive energy; determined; a feeling of invincibility.

Examples Of Use:

Hubby: are you going to work out tonight?

Me: yip, I am planning on doing two rounds of Zumba Express and then my BowFlex routine. I am super pumped to get 3 workouts in this week and maybe walk the dog! Oh and I’m going to clean the house later to. And my WIP is screaming my name. Gotta hit my word count this week!

Hubby: who lit the spark in your ass?

Memy ROW80 cheerleaders and B12 baby! I’m like a new woman! You’re going to have to get your back healed if you want to keep up with me!

Hubby: I guess so maybe.

What lights a spark in your ass? Come on…share the wealth…

P.S. In case you missed Monday’s post where I spotlight author Virginia Ripple, you should definitely check it out. There’s a great giveaway! Squeeee…

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