Urban Word Wednesday: Fartriliquism

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME, hubby…and…the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Fartriliquism: the art of farting near someone in a large group and making it appear that someone else in the group is the farter.

Examples Of Use:

Hubby and I were grabbing a healthy lunch at Pita Pit on Saturday when we enjoyed the following conversation.

Me: hey hubby, remember when we saw Jeff Dunham last week?

Hubby: yeah! Why?

Me: well you know how he was an amazing ventriloquist?

Hubby: yeah, he was amazing, why?!?!

Me: well I have a talent similar to Jeff’s.

Hubby: oh yeah, what’s that?

Me: I am a master in the art of fartriliquism!

Hubby: what in the god’s name is that???

Me: well…do you smell that???

Hubby: yeah….

Me: well that was me. But everyone in here thinks it was you! Heehee

Me: I can throw my farts. In large groups of people, I add in a “nose turned up” disgusted look to someone two or three people over from me to really make the throw authentic. No joke; I’ve tried it and it works every time! Not to mention, no one ever suspects a girl!! I am a master fartriliquist!

Hubby: you are sick and demented!

Me: I wonder if Jeff will add me to his show???? EEEKEE!! I’ll be famous!!!

Hubby: I doubt it!!

Me: whatever! You are just jealous of my many talents!

Are you a fartriliquist? How do you cover fluffing in public? Do you make it look like it was someone else, ignore the obvious, or fess up with an “excuse me”?

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