Strap on shoes???

As you know from my “what do your shoes say about you?” post, I have a slight love affair with shoes. I try not to discriminate; I love everything from sneakers to flip-flops to boots to stilettos. All shoes deserve love…right?

This week, Jansen Schmidt sent me pictures of the most insane shoes I’ve ever seen (I love it when you guys send me the crazy stuff you find online). These pushed even my shoe boundaries. I draw the line when I can’t stand up straight or run from potential assailants. I’m all for fashion and flirty but these seem downright dangerous. And I have to say it…there’s nothing sexy about walking like you need to hit the washroom ASAP (while moving at the speed of smell and like a zombie).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I think they’d give some of Lady Gaga’s wackiest shoes a run for their money.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Standing next to Gaga, there’s nothing in my shoe closet that’d even compare. And I’ve even started branching out. Dang…do I need to step up my game? Have I lost my shoe edge? I mean, the fashion police say you can wear just about anything with a black pant suit, right? Maybe I should invest in some of these sparkly shoe fashion statements. Think I’d turn heads at the office walking in with a pair of these bad boys on? Perhaps not the image I am trying to elicit.

Good for Gaga. Not so good for Natalie.

After watching the first shoe video, I couldn’t let it go. I had to know…why? For who? Seriously? I wanted to poke some serious fun at them.

But it turns out, their insanity was on purpose. They are a collaboration between artist Leanie van der Vyver and Dutch shoe designer René van den Berg to serve as a visual representation of today’s impossible standards of beauty. Ummmm.

When you put it like that….making fun at this point would seem slightly…ummmm…. tacky?!?!

Good job gentlemen – powerful visual (might I suggest some text or voice over to ensure your message gets across…just a suggestion…I’ll shut up now).

Don’t I just feel like the world’s biggest ass.

What are the craziest shoes you’ve ever worn? If comfort and ability weren’t an issue, what’s the most outrageous shoe you’d wear? How do your different shoes make you feel? Come on…share the wealth…

More blog deliciousness here:

Advertisements

Comments

  1. Lady Gaga will probably need foot surgery in another 10 years. I like shoes, but I don’t think I’ve worn anything that approaches this level of insanity. Stick to pink and glitz, Natalie! Pink and glitz go with way more than a black pantsuit. 😉

  2. amyskennedy says:

    I love the “idea” of killer high heels – not so much the reality. When I was super young had a job as a cocktail waitress in a scmancy restaurant/nightclub, we wore pretty awesome dresses, but we HAD to wear high heels, they were part of our uniform. Not kidding. Granted, I learned some mad cocktailing skills there – like how to walk through a smash of paople with a laden tray balanced high over everyone’s head. This skill has served me well.

  3. Coleen Patrick says:

    I like to look at pretty shoes. I kind of have shoe envy. Because of stupid bunions, I can only wear wide flat shoes–I call it my Minnie Mouse style. Yuck. However, if I get the foot surgery, then I could wear them. LOL Extreme though, right?

    • OUCH!!!! Girl…my heart breaks for you. Nothing worse than debilitating foot issues that limit your choice. At least flats are VERY in right now with some super fabulous styles….but I hear ya…shoe envy for sure. Extreme isn’t worth it…go for comfort. 🙂

  4. Natalie, I was thinking the same thing about the shoes in the first video, although the somber music and expression on her face should have been a dead giveaway, LOL.

    I’m not a shoe fashionista, but I can certainly appreciate when I see a fab pair of shoes that perfectly complete an outfit!

    Interesting post!

  5. I get blisters on my heels just watching her!

  6. Oh. My. Those shoes are um, wow. I don’t even think they’re cute. Nor are Gaga’s. Well, a few of them might be, but they look like torture devices. I’ve never been a fan of high heels. I look like a total spaz when I wear them! I’ll stick to my comfy and cute low-heeled shoes. Comfort is sexy. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!

    • Amen Sista!! I hear you…and I’ve seen some of your FABULOUS shoes on display and they are ultra cute and ultra sexy. It’s all in the attitude of the wearer, right?!

      BAM…girl you got it going ON! 🙂

    • I’ll second that amen. I wear flats (buckle, shiny, strappy), sneakers, and I don’t know what you’d call them. Pool shoes? Just a sole with a wide band across the top. I had a pair of really high wedge heels once (had to fix the typo ‘hells’ just then…but I think hells is more appropriate). I threw them away after wearing them once. Comfort is sexy.

      Unfortunately, I hate shoes. I’d much rather be barefoot. 🙂

  7. My feet won’t let me wear anything uncomfortable anymore. Punishment is swift and vicious. LOL

    • I am slowly getting there Pauline but I am going kicking and screaming. LOL!!! I have now started foot physio to see if I can get back into my beauties. I give it a 50/50. Pray for me.

  8. Those reverse high heels are something like expensive jeans with holes in them. I don’t need to pay money for tortuous shoes or for ratty looking jeans when I can have them for cheap. 🙂

    Thanks sincerely for the shout out.

  9. Natalie – Shoes – Oh how I used to love them and wore 3 1/2 inch heels (which is nothing these days) from about 6:00 a.m. until after the bars closed from a night of dancing around 2:00 a.m. I loved shoes – and every color was a necessity. But, I really loved my red high heels. Then — the ultimate tragedy. Smashed feet in a car accident and that was the end of heels – and total emotional tragedy the day I had to clean out my shoe closet and send them off for donation. I couldn’t bear to look at them and not be able to wear them. I held out on the red heels the longest and it took me another 3 years before I’d give them away. Heels all day for work, heels for graduate school at night, and then we went dancing — that was the routine — happy days — but shoe shopping is no longer much fun — but ocassionally find a pair I really fall for.

    • Oh Sheri…that is the saddest story. My heart breaks. No one should be torn away from their shoes like that. I can’t imagine the heart ache of giving them away but bless you for doing so.

      I will say that I have seen more and more super fabulous flat/comfy shoes on the market which is a God sent! I have never understood why they couldn’t translate some of those AMAZING high heel styles into flat, comfy shoes?!?! Like WTF?!?! I am glad to see shoe designers are trying to hit every market…

      Here’s to fabulous and foot friendly!

      • amyskennedy says:

        Oh, I’m so sorry. But, I’m with Natalie, there are some sweeeet flats out there. And think of the joy someone else got from finding your gems.

  10. I love the idea of heels. My back loves the reality of low wedges. sighhhh I have 30 pairs of sandals but live in a snowy country. I’m feeling the disconnect right now.

  11. I’m the same as Louise. My back and ankles just can’t handle heels. But these are ridiculous!

  12. Well Natalie I’m glad you put my “suggestion” to good use here on your blog. I figured when I watched the video that there was some kind of hidden message there, but . . . . I didn’t really get it. Anyone who’s ever worn a pair of toe shoes for those ballet classes, knows how much torture that foot/leg position is. I know, I’ve worn them. Tremendous amount of pressure on the ankles and feet. Thank God I’m too old and fat and slow now for that kind of dancing.

    I wear heels almost every day to work because I work in a professional office. I love heels. But, I’m also short so adding the extra inches (sometimes up to 4/12) makes me feel more noticeable and confident. Nobody notices short people, unless they’re midgets. I’m not quite that short. I also find that wearing heels improves my posture. I tend to slouch when I’m wearing flat shoes. The heels with the pointy little heels remind me that balance is important and therefore I need to remember to stand up straight.

    Thanks for the videos. I actually kind of liked some of Lady Gaga’s shoes. I’d wear them for a special or wacky event.

    Patricia Rickrode
    w/a Jansen Schmidt

    • I didn’t get it either. I actually thought they were someone’s creation for sale. But after doing the research, it definitely made more sense. 🙂

      I cannot imagine toe point shoes. They’ve always looked torturous to me. Hence the reason I stayed in jazz. LOL!

      41/2 inch heels – girl – you are my hero!! OMG luv! I totally hear you on the confidence and the standing tall. I feel the same way. In a great pair of heels, I hold my head high and every hall way is my own personal runway. I feel…fashionista! A chubby fashionista but one none the less. Not to mention, although my waist line continues to expand, my shoe size DOES NOT. BAM! I can always count on my shoes to help me feel fabulous. 🙂

      However, about a year ago I suffered a foot injury. I tore the ligaments in both feet and my metatarsal bone dropped. I fought it for so long but the pain of heels become excruciating. Very sad story. I know. BUT, I didn’t give up hope. I saw the doc, did the research and LIVED in my birkenstocks for like 5 months. Now I am doing some foot physio and have started retraining my feet in low heels, slowly but surely. I am determined to wear every pair in my closet again…

      Pray for me….then we could have a weekly blog SHOE off?!!?!

      Lady Gaga….there are definitely a few of her shoes I’d like to try…just to see if nothing else! LOL!!

      • Oh dear, a foot injury does not sound fun at all. I’ll be praying for a full recovery. We certainly could do a shoe blog and show off our fabulous footwear. I have some really tacky gold shoes with big ole fake diamonds on them that I always take on cruises with me. They are part of my standing cruisewear line. I love wearing tacky stuff on a cruise. Stuff I’d never wear anywhere else, I’ll wear on a cruise. No explanation for that either.

        Take care of those feet! I wanna see them in some flashy Gaga heels real soon.

        Patricia

        • Those sound FAB.U.LOUS!! Gotta love having a venue to break out your most fabulous tacky wear…I go a little insane when we go down to the Dominican wearing stuff I’d never leave the house in here. Love it! Gotta break it out!!

          A blog shoe off is a must – as soon as I am heeled and can dawn some of my funnest shoes, we’ll plan something. 🙂

  13. If comfort wasn’t an issue.. I’d probably be wearing platform stilettos every day of the week. Unfortunately, that’s not the case.

  14. Fortunately, my feet are a bit wide, so I can’t fit in most “crazy” heels. Plus, I was a bit of a tomboy. Although I wear heels on occassion, nothing is outrageous.
    Natalie, sick as it sounds, when I saw your title I fully prepared myself to see male parts sticking up from high heels…maybe some new combination for the submissive foot fetishist…LOL! I just never know what to expect. (Plus, if they can have stuff like that strapped on to people’s faces, why not their feet? 😉

    • Kitt…I LOVE IT! FAB idea for an upcoming blog post. HMMMM….will require research (which I LOVE doing by the way so thank you…). Stay tuned…LOL!!

      I love that you had no idea what to expect and if anything, expected the craziest things. Branding…CHECK! LOL!! 🙂

      Ahhh…well heels aren’t the only thing that makes a shoe sexy. It’s whatever you FEEL most FABULOUS in. Flats, sneakers…whatever! As long as you love it, it’s the bomb!

  15. Being vertically challenged, I still love to wear heels whenever appropriate. Otherwise, I loooove my comfy slippers that are waiting for me just inside the front door. No Lady GaGa footwear for me!

  16. I have always had the hardest time finding shoes to fit my large feet. I’m all about comfort, but a low heel is OK. It’s getting easier to find shoes in my size. I’m not sure if it’s because more men are cross dressing, or what.

    • ROFL Diana…more men cross dressing?!?! Stellar…and in the end…WHATEVER works right?!?! LOL!! Here’s to flirty, fabulous and low heeled finds! 🙂

      • It’s crazy! My sweet husband surprised me by buying me a couple of pairs of shoes once. He said the clerk asked him if he wanted to try them on! His foot is bigger than mine, just to make that clear. When I find those flirty, fabulous, and low-heeled shoes (and they fit my feet), I’m buying them!

        • OMG…do you want to try them on?!?! LOL!! He must have just about died. I have a friend that worked in a lingerie store and said we’d be amazed how many men would shop and would TRY STUFF on!! O.M.G.! 🙂

Don't be shy...tell me what you think

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: