Hubby’s Corner: the performance review


A performance review can be a great tool for an organization to evaluate an employee’s performance; be it good or bad.  It’s a great tool to communicate expectations and goals and share a two-way feedback that may not be communicated on a daily basis. I recently received my annual performance review and being a supervisor, I also had to deliver several performance reviews.

As I was preparing one of the performance reviews this week, it dawned on me. I wondered why people do not use performance reviews in their marriages and/or relationships? I think all of our relationships could benefit from well-defined goals and expectations and feedback. Each person in the relationship would know if their partner rates them to be exceeding expectations or continuously delivering at unsatisfactory levels. I think this would quickly thin out the herd and leave only the quality performers to make the cut and the others would either work on their weaknesses or be escorted to the door as they quit or fired.

I sat back in my chair, internally chuckling as I fantasized about delivering performance reviews to my friends, family and Natalie. I laughed even harder when I role played the exchange and feedback I might receive as a friend, relative, father or husband.

How many relationships are on cruise control where one side is not happy with something the other has done, said, or is not doing or saying?

I think everyone thinks they are doing a great job from their own mind’s eye but have you ever stopped to pull on the spectacles of the other person in this relationship?

I challenge you to stop and give the people in your life a performance review – let them know what you value, appreciate, and commend them on things you may just take for granted that they bring to your life. Take the opportunity to let them know what you are looking for from them. Then ask that person to give some honest feedback on how you might improve as a friend, relative, husband, etc.

Maybe if Harold had an annual performance review he wouldn’t feel this way about his marriage:

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Natalie and I give very regular feedback to one another, both serious and humorous, on what we expect for respect, loyalty, involvement, goals and dreams. And so far we both seem happy with our performance review. Neither of us has had to deliver the bad news…

Do you give and take annual performance reviews in your relationships? How do you think you rank? Come on…share the wealth….

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