Urban Word Wednesday: iFinger

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

iFinger: The finger(s) you purposely keep clean when you eat something messy so you can operate your touch screen smart phone/tablet/GPS without making the screen look like your plate

Examples Of Use:

Hubby and I were at Pizza Delight (a weakness last week) when the waiter got the biggest kick out of our conversation.

Hubby: OMG I’ve missed pizza!

Me: I know, eh?!?! It’s absolutely delicious. Nice to have as a treat.

Hubby: ummmm…what in God’s name are you doing?

Me: (innocently) what???

Hubby: with your hand? You are holding the pizza like it’s diseased or something. Or like your hand is half paralyzed. What in God’s name?!?!?

Me: these are my iFingers. I need to keep them clean! Duh!

Hubby: iFingers?!?!?! I am almost afraid to ask. What are iFingers?

Me: you know, the fingers I keep clean while eating something messy in case of any imminent blackberry usage.

Hubby: imminent blackberry usage??? What could be so imminent that it couldn’t wait until you were done a slice or two of pizza?

Me: Baby…it’s social media! My fans could tweet or post a comment on my blog that requires my immediate attention. Napkin wiping could take away valuable seconds not to mention the grease transference risk.  

Hubby: Seriously?!?! Well you look semi retarded holding your pizza like that? The waiter probably thinks you are my decrepit cousin out for her weekly on-the-town venture!

Me: whatever. It’s my commitment to my fans and they appreciate it even if you don’t so laugh all you want!

What about you? Do you have an iFinger(s) that you keep clean while eating for smart phone usage? Tell me I am not alone here! Come on…share the wealth!

P.S. In case you missed Monday’s post where I spotlight author Elena Aitken, you should definitely check it out. There’s a great giveaway! Squeeee….

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Comments

  1. And never, ever, pick your nose with your Ifinger. :))

  2. Hubby aka The Blog Heckler says:

    *Biting my lip* – if only that finger could talk! LOL!

  3. ROTFL

    I think I’m glad I’m so uncouth as to NOT have social media on my phone. Priceless Natalie.

  4. OMG, Natalie, the dedication you have to your fans! So impressive. I can just picture it. Eating ribs would be even more challenging 🙂

    I have a confession to make: when I saw the title of your post, I thought it was going to be about an app on the iPhone that shows “the finger,” LOL!

    • It is dedication pure and simple Kathy, thank you so much for recognizing that *grinning wide here*! Rib would be quite challenging indeed. I’d have to learn how to eat them with a fork or perhaps have hubby hold them while I munch! LOL!
      Ohhhhh…that would be fahhhbulous too – I think I’ll have to research to see if such a thing exists!! 🙂

  5. Ha! Hilarious. This reminds me of stories my mom has told me about people in India who keep their left hand pinky clean and nail-polished for use as an ear wax cleaner. Love it, Natalie. You’re an urban word genius!

  6. You silly girl. The ifinger. Would you need a iPhone or iPad in order for the ifinger to work properly? And for crying out loud, just eat the pizza Natalie. Enjoy it. Your fans will wait. We ain’t going anywhere! 🙂

  7. I totally get you. It’s my right hand pinkie finger for me. Never, ever let it get messy! Due diligence, people! We must be available at any time to tweet or comment. Addicted to social media? Me? Not at all, it’s all about the fans. 😉 (That’s what I keep telling the hubs, but he isn’t buying it either.)

    • LOVE it Tameri!!! LOVE IT!!
      I know…hubby calls it an addiction as well but I think it’s just a healthy respect for the real-time aspect of social media. I mean, if you are going to do it, right?!?! Do it well!! Our fans NEED us!!
      LMAO!!!!!
      I sometimes forget that although I can hear my insanely sarcastic voice in my head (and God I sound good…wow…LOL) I realize that y’all can’t so I hope the HUMOR and sarcasm is coming thru!! LOL!!

  8. That is a great one, even though my phone is a droid not an i product. It’s kind like that custom if having a wiping hand & a non wiping hand. 🙂

  9. Yep, I’m a proud owner of the iFinger too. Although my iPhone goes down into my purse when I eat 🙂
    I often read blogs on my phone wile walking. My hands used to get cold so I found a pair of fabulous iGloves in a store! They have a small patch of fabric over the tips of both iFingers. Priceless!

  10. The iFinger! Makes perfect sense. And I’ve known a lot of people who do it that way. I’ve never done that simply cause I don’t want a smart phone. I figure folks should be able to wait on me. But kudos to you for caring that much!

  11. OMG, how funny. I’m amazed by your dedication girlfriend. I learn so much from you! I bow to the multi-tasker queen. Great post!

  12. OMG I had my first experience of this recently. I got a new smartphone and was eating wings…I had to keep my index finger clean so I could work through my email on my phone. too funny

  13. Elena Aitken says:

    YES!!
    I do this ALL the time!! Especially now that I have my pretty new iphone!

  14. There! THANK YOU! Everyone thinks I’m nuts because when I eat popcorn while at my computer, I eat it like cereal…with a spoon. The first time I tried it…without the spoon…it was gross. So I can totally see why the iFinger is so important. You just know if I’m not going to get butter all over my keyboard, I’m NOT going to mess up my phone. 🙂

Trackbacks

  1. […] Need a good laugh? Who doesn’t these days? Make sure you follow Natalie Hartford’s blog. This week? The iFinger. […]

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