Impaired driver kills parents of 5 and serves only 7 months in jail

I was deeply saddened by the news that Chad Olsen was granted full parole this month. In 2010, he drove drunk and hit and killed Brad and Krista Howe leaving their 5 children (aged between 5 and 15) orphaned in an instant.

The Howe’s took part in this year’s MADD Canada’s school assembly program video which The Dude also participated in so I am very familiar with their story and felt an even deeper sense of sadness for them.

The 25-year-old only actually served 7 months in custody (custody being Bowden’s minimum-security annex, which houses low-risk inmates in dormitory-style bungalows outside the prison walls). So when you read that he spent time in a federal prison, let’s be clear. It was no Shawshank.

After 7 months, Olsen was granted day parole where he lived in a half way house and had to abide by a curfew and a condition banning him from drinking alcohol. Then…just this month he was granted full parole, which means he will serve out the remaining 2 years and a couple of months of his sentence in the community. He gets to live with his fiancé, work full-time, maybe go back to school etc. Whatever. The only 2 special conditions are that he abstains from alcohol and that he attends psychological counselling. And he has to check in with a parole officer.

He was granted full parole because the board found that he did not pose undue risk to the public and full parole would help him ease back into full integration with society.

Well isn’t that swell!

I am sure if you had asked any of Olsen’s friends and family before the crash, they would have said he didn’t pose an undue risk to the public.

I understand about rehabilitation. I understand about re-integration but what about the victims’ and society’s right to expect an offender to face and serve adequate consequences for the nature of the crime? Two people lost their lives, 5 children will grow up orphans, some so young they likely won’t even really remember their parents.

It shouldn’t be just about his risk factor to reoffend, how sorry he is and what a “good” person he really is. It should also be about all of that AND whether he paid his debt and faced appropriate consequences for his actions.

Olsen’s blood alcohol level was 3 times over the legal limit. He ran a red light doing 85 KM an hour. He KILLED 2 people who were only 34 and 35 years old and had 5 children depending on them. He did that. He made that choice.

How is 7 months custody, 9 months day parole, and 2+ years full parole even close to adequate?

In a news report, Olsen is quoted as saying he’s not a terrible person; he just made a terrible mistake.

And I get that. To be frank, if I knew him I’d likely even agree with him. I’d probably feel sorry for him and wish the whole thing had never happened. But that’s not the point. It doesn’t matter how “good” of a person he was/is, how sorry he is, or what a “terrible mistake” it was. It was a choice. A choice to drive drunk that cost the lives of 2 very innocent people and the consequences for that choice need to be paid. Period.

I am stunned. That this is what Brad and Krista’s lives were worth according to our justice system? 7 months in jail? That’s it?

Sure day parole and full parole have restrictions but come on! Olsen is living with his fiancé, has a full-time job, is thinking about going back to school, and is reintegrating back into life with family and friends with Christmas on the horizon. While the Howe children are wondering how to get through another holiday without their parents. They are the ones serving a life sentence for his choices.

How can any read this story and think “oh yeah, if it was my Mom and Dad he ran down drunk and killed, I’d be cool with him only serving 7 months…and getting full parole after only 16 months…I mean, he didn’t mean to do it, right?!”

And what message does this send out? What does this say to other potential offenders?

To me, it says that our system is a joke.

I commend the family for their response to his parole. Krista’s mother is quoted in the news as saying that if Olsen follows through with his plans to give back to the community, including plans to talk to high school students about the dangers of drinking and driving, then full parole is a good thing. She hopes something good can come out of all it going as far as saying that she’d welcome Olsen joining forces with her to fight for increase impaired driving penalties.

Having just sat in a parole board hearing wondering if the drunk driver that killed my mother-in-law would be released after serving only 14 months in the not-really-a-jail jail, I don’t think I could have been as kind.

Nope.

She’s a braver woman than I.

Olsen’s release comes just days before new legislation for impaired drivers will take effect in Alberta on September 1. Maybe had these initiatives been in place, the Howe’s would still be with us. Alas, I know hubby and I have played the “what if” game a zillion times. I know hubby has been tormented and guilt-ridden wondering what he could have done differently that would have altered his Mom’s choice to be on the road that day. But in the end, we can’t look back because we can’t change anything. All we can do is look forward towards prevention.

Police have said in various news reports that they feel the new strengthened legislation will give them more tools to deal with impaired drivers.

I say HOORAH to that!

And to the non-supporters of the new legislation, I say “lose a loved one to this crime and then come talk to me. Until then, shut your pie hole and pound sand!

What do you think about day and full parole? Do you think the nature of the crime and the impact on victims should be taken into consideration before an offender is conditionally released? How do we determine “appropriate consequences” for crimes? How do you let go of the “what if” game? I’d love to hear your thoughts…

On August 1, 2009, my beautiful mother-in-law’s life was cut tragically short by an impaired driver and my stepson’s life changed forever. In honor of Donna and Jordan Kennie, please don’t drink and drive. Impaired driving is 100% preventable. Think about it.

Support MADD Canada and follow them on Facebook, Twitter (@maddcanada), YouTube, and on the Web.

More blog deliciousness here:

Urban Word Wednesday: When Jesus Comes

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME, hubby…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Is this how you want to be when Jesus comes back?: a slang saying hubby jokingly asks me to see if I am comfortable with my behavior or (more likely) my choice of words and/or continued joking. Gets asked a lot when we are bantering back and forth. Originally from the movie Joe Dirt (see 4:41…it’s one of hubby’s favorite movies).

Examples Of Use:

Hubby and I were at the campground on the weekend and had dinner at the little canteen Friday evening. They make the BEST chicken strips. YUM! Given there was a good size crowd waiting to order and get food, hubby and I (as usual) decided to indulge in some friendly marital shock-and-awe bantering to keep everyone entertained. You know us when we get around a crowd of strangers. The gloves come off and laughter follows.

Note: there were no children scarred for life in the making of this Urban Word Wednesday post.

Hubby: so…we…ummm…gonna get it on later? Get the trailer a rocking?

Me: well with foreplay like that…absolutely! How could I resist??? I am wet just hearing the words. I nearly had an orgasm right here. Blew. My. Socks. Off. How about we skip dinner and go behind that tree right there?

Hubby: give a guy a break. I am not investing all that time and effort in foreplay just to get an “I’m tired…” I gotta know upfront if I stand a chance or not. Then I’ll invest. Just sayin’!

Me: sweep me off my feet Mr. Romance. We women can’t commit in advance. Lord. With all my hormones ranging around, I don’t know how I’m going to feel in 2 minutes, let alone 2 hours. Even if I said “sure thing hot stuff” right now…it ain’t a guarantee…sorry…but you’ll just have to take your chances…

Hubby: is this where you want to be when Jesus comes back?

Me: bring it on hubby…I ain’t afraid! Me and Jesus are hooked up! He’s got my back.

Hubby: seriously?!?!

Me: hell yes…triple z snap!

What are your favorite slang sayings that you and your partner share? Any inside jokes you wanna share? What phrases does he/she have that always crack you up, put a smile on your face and make you laugh? Come on…share the wealth…

More blog deliciousness here:

Missed connections…online cupid fun

Ok. I am sooooo out of touch! I had NO IDEA. I can’t believe I didn’t know. Why didn’t someone tell me?!?!

About. Missed. Connections.

I came to it almost by accident. I discovered the YouTube talk show Dirty Talk Dating (fabulous – love these people!) with Tess and Lou’s interview with Melissa Center who started Missed Connections Live where she produced funny videos BASED on real New York Missed Connections postings.

If you are like me, your first question is “what’s a missed connection post?”

Well…I guess people all around the world write and post these “missed connections” advertisements on Craigslist detailing their “missed connection” with someone. Perhaps it was someone you locked eyes with on the subway but didn’t have the guts to talk to; maybe an arm brush at the coffee shop with a cute guy and as you went to say hi, he turned and walked away; or maybe it was an incidental urinal meeting between two men where you wish you’d have had the guts to introduce yourself but felt the moment wasn’t quite right.

Shut up? I know! It’s true!

People actually post this stuff. And then someone makes funny videos about it.

ONLY on the Internet could we be so fortunate.

Although sadly, it seems like Melissa isn’t posting any more videos. We can all console ourselves by watching the ones she did put together. Here are a couple of my personal FAVS!

Hey Beautiful Lady

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Be My John Roberts

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OMG hilarious!

Then for shits and giggles, I went on Craiglist to see if Missed Connections is for real and guess what…it IS!!! Here are some samples from yesterday’s Toronto’s Missed Connections section on Craiglist that I just had to share…

JEWISH BAKERY/RESTAURANT – m4w – 42 (Very specific)

Date: 2012-08-27
Reply to this post

Today I was at a very well known toronto jewish bakery/restuarant for lunch. You were sitting with there with a friend. We casually exchanged glances and I have to say you looked terrific. If this is you and you read this..what restaurant were we at

Goodlife gym – m4m (Kingsmill (Etobicoke))

Date: 2012-08-27
Reply to this post

We were side by side at the urinal today. You – bearish, goatee. You were playing with yourself and you caught me looking at you. We made eye contact as I turned to leave. Hope to see you back there again. If you see this, tell me what I was wearing so I know it’s you.

Gorgeous ebony in black and white dress waiting in bus stop – m4w – 50 (Albion Road and Armel Court)

Date: 2012-08-27
Reply to this post

This is a long shot, but I felt compelled to post an ad just in case you or somebody who knows you sees this. I was driving northbound on Albion Road around 10:15 AM today, and when I got to Armel Court, you were standing in the bus stop, wearing a black and white dress, to the best of my recollection. I was driving by in a black vehicle. Our eyes met as I passed you, and you flashed me a great smile which I returned. I was going to turn around immediately and go back and talk to you, but alas, I didn’t. In any case, if you do see this, please contact me. I would love to meet you and see more of that gorgeous smile!

Goodlife chat – m4m – 40 (North York/Toronto)

Date: 2012-08-27
Reply to this post

This is going to sound way too cryptic but here goes. I’ve seen you around this location of GoodLife (not a downtown location btw) for about 3 years and only recently have we started acknowledging each other – to the point where last week I introduced myself – N___ to you by name and you told me your name S___. We’re both over the age of 40 – (i assume you are – i know i am). We’ve only talked about your fitness regime and my running. I’d like to take it further. It never seems to be the right time to strike up a conversation with you, but damn I’d like to! I think you’re married (to a woman no less!) but my senses tell me something more is going on. Anyway in the rare chance that you read this we had a very brief interchange this morning and i wish i’d continued it beyond what was said. Write me back if you recognize any of this. – i’m keeping it cryptic for obvious reasons.

Just call me cupid!

Did you know about this Missed Connections thing (and if so…why did you not tell me?!?!)? Have you ever posted a Missed Connection? Ever had a Missed Connection you wish you would have posted about? Come on…share the wealth…

It’s Twisted Tuesday and that means it’s time to enjoy a smile, giggle or laugh…here’s hoping I’ve provided it in spades…enjoy!

More blog deliciousness here:

He is the deet in my Deep Woods Off

The scene of the infestation!

Hubby and I spent another fine weekend deep in campground country chilllaxin’ this weekend. And yes, we brought my shit shack with us; otherwise known as Nat’s Stool Shed (why hubby has chosen that nickname is beyond me…I only use it for number 1). I think he’s having a sign made. How wonderful.

Anyway….back to the point of my story. We soon discovered that it’s caterpillar season at the campground. There were oodles of the little creatures everywhere. Mostly the white/black type which kind of freaked me out because I had heard they can be deadly. After a little Google search, turns out I was being a wee bit dramatic (shocking…I know….). They aren’t deadly but some people can have an allergic reaction to them in the form of an itchy rash after touching. So I was not going near them.

In all honesty, I am just not a huge bug fan. Hubby is actually surprised I enjoy camping as much as I do given my distaste for all things insect. Bugs, ants, spiders, flies…UGH. I mean, I am not afraid of ALL of them but I certainly don’t want to be BFF with any of them. And yes, I do scream and flail around like an epileptic having a seizure when I surprisingly find something on me.  This weekend, that happened a lot.

There we’d be…playing crib at the picnic table. I’d be kicking hubby’s butt when I’d just happen to glance down at my lap and BAM…one of the white crawling devils would be plotting my rash demise. I’d leap up in a single bound, scream hysterically and start doing the dance of “get this freaking creepy caterpillar off me NOW!!!!”

UGH!

It was exhausting standing on guard all the time. Where were these bad boys coming from and how the heck were they getting on my lap? I started wearing a hat fearing they had hidden wings and were circling the obvious weakest link.

But I must say hubby proved to be my hero time and time again.

He got up from the table or his chair a hundred times to “magically sweep” away the persistent little bastards. This was no small job given the world-wide domination and infestation that was going on (perhaps being a tad dramatic here but there were a LOT of them). Not to mention, I started developing a keen eye for spotting one within a 20 foot parameter of what I deemed my “caterpillar-free safety zone”. I armed hubby with a fly swatter and was commander-in-chief sending him out into battle over and over again.

Hubby…there’s one over there crawling over a leaf 10 feet from the fire pit on the left hand side next to the green twig. Quick…get him!!

No insecticide needed here. I had Soldier Hubby in the trenches fighting the good fight; being the deet to my Deep Woods Off.

I gotta say, there’s nothing quite so romantic as your loved one putting a smile on his face time and time again regardless of the incessant inconvenience to do you a solid.

Sweep. Me. Off. My. Feet.

How does your significant other sweep you off your feet? What things does he/she do that you know deep down drives him/her batty, but they do it anyway…with a smile…for you? Come on…share the wealth….

More blog deliciousness here:

  • August McLaughlin’s post on learning to trust our instincts was bang on. Not just in your writing life but across the board!
  • Loved this post by Lisa Hall-Wilson on what makes a real man. So timely with today’s post because I am so grateful that I held out for hubby…he is the real deal! And the real deal is always worth waiting for.
  • Fab post by Elena Aitken on taking time to unplug and how important it is that we all do it from time to time. Tks for the wonderful reminder girl!

Urban Word Wednesday: Sexpiration Date

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Sexpiration Date: When a man or woman has reached the maximum amount of time he or she can go without sexual intercourse.

Example Of Use:

Hubby and I were at the movies on Friday night. We went and saw Expendables 2 (loved it). By the time we got to the theatre, it was nearly full. We were having our popcorn, waiting for the movie to start while enjoying our usual banter. Much to our neighbors delight.

Hubby: do you think this could be a real “date night” tonight?

Me: what do you mean?

Hubby: you know….dinner…a movie…home for a little quality nookie?

Me: you call eating at the mall food court dinner?

Hubby: ok…since I short-changed you on dinner, I’d be willing to opt for a quickie when we get home. A little wham bam!

Me: hmmm…you’ve got yourself a deal! What’s up with your need to confirm here and now?

Hubby: I’ve reached my sexpiration date.

Me: sexpiration date?

Hubby: you know….the max amount of time I can go without getting it on.

Me: what happens if you pass your sexpiration date? Do you go chunky and awful smelling like the milk?

*I thought the ladies in front of us were going to DIE”

Hubby: nice…of course not. But I do get kind of cranky.

Me: True enough. Not worth the risk. We’ll take care of that tonight!

What’s your sexpiration date? Is it the same or different from your partners? Come on…share the wealth…

More blog deliciousness here:

Tasty tacos and tube steak delight

So yesterday I was talking about how I’ve recently discovered olive oil as a fabulous new sexual lubricant. One of the great things about using it in that fashion is say mid-session you or your partner wanna head downtown for a little nibble, you can. No more worrying about ingesting store-bought lubricants. You can lower your cholesterol with heart-healthy olive oil while you pleasure your partner. Talk about killing two birds with one stone.

I mean, hell, why not toss some garlic or oregano down there and make a salad out of it?!

Ok, maybe that’s pushing the olive oil envelop since I doubt my hooha would appreciate being sprinkled with garlic…nor would hubby be thrilled with me making his rod a balsamic salad stick…

But…this did get me thinking.

God help us!

I got to thinking about products that enhance that taste of giving oral pleasure. I’ve never found the intimate canned whip cream too tasty (go for the real deal on that one) but hubby and I have tried some flavored gels that work wonderfully. Chocolate, mango, BANANA…yummy!!! Though if you plan on getting back to basics afterwards, not so sure I’d want that sticky stick on the inside, if you know what I mean?!?! And although they might “enhance” the flavor…they don’t always completely hide the taste…

Till NOW that is…

One of my loyal readers (THANK YOU) forwarded me this fabulousness: MASQUE Sexual Flavors.

Developed by a team of scientist and researchers, MASQUE is like the fellatio version of Listerine dissolvable strip. It’s an engineered formula that combines individual taste blockers which are microencapsulated on a paper-thin, orally dissolvable strip that you place on your tongue moments before the big event. It’s specifically designed to completely conceal the taste of semen. Shut up?!?! Seriously!??!

The strips enhances the taste with either chocolate, strawberry, watermelon or mango flavors (all with a slight hint of mint) while, supposedly, completely neutralizing flavors associated with oral sex on men, especially the taste of semen (salts, bitters, and proteins).

Although not designed to be used the other way around, if you want to pleasure your lady friend and send her man in the boat sailing, the FAQ portion of the website says that they’ve received reports of women enjoying the hint of mint in the downtown region.

And they last up 15 minutes.

Although if hubby last 15 minutes, I won’t be talking right for a week!

How do you keep things spicy in the bedroom? Know of any fabulous oral pleasure taste enhancers? Would you give MASQUE a try? Come on…share the wealth….

It’s Twisted Tuesday and that means it’s time to enjoy a smile, giggle or laugh…here’s hoping I’ve provided it in spades…enjoy!

(P.S. I LOVE it when readers come across little delights and forward them my way…if you find something you’d love to see featured on a Twisted Tuesday, send it over via the Contact Me form)

More blog deliciousness here:

Solved: the case of the angry bird

In June I told you how I have been living with an angry bird for what feels like forever. It’s been at least one year (maybe closer to two) that I’ve been tormented by chronic bladder infections and a burning vajayjay that’s kept my lustful Fifty Shades of Grey inner sex Goddess at bay.

I’m happy to report, my Goddess divine (who has no scruples when it comes to this sort of thing) finally kicked that burning bird to the curb and we’ve been living burn-free for over a MONTH people! That’s like an eternity in burn-free days!

I didn’t come across the fix right away. After I read all your amazing suggestions, I thought that perhaps I had taking so many anti-biotics, that my vajayjay was like a war zone with all my good bacteria lying down like fallen and wounded soldiers in the field. Perhaps my vaginal canal was a hostile environment? So I promptly headed out to treat the ol’ girl right.

I started with an oral treatment for a yeast infection (just in case). I made probiotics my new BFF ingesting 16 billion live cultures of acidophilus every day. Not to mention the Greek yogurt and berries fetish I’ve developed. I gave up my deliciously, wonderful baths (this has been like torture in and of itself…I love my bath time!) AND…torture number 2…Hubby and I abstained from bumping nasties for two. whole. weeks.

The night came to see if all our hard work paid off. With bated breath we got down to business and BAM…she’s BACKKKKK!! The burning bearded clam returned with a vengeance. I swear flames were firing out of her. I was desolate. Hubby was depressed. I just about gave up. What else could I try?

I was just about to resort to a yogurt douche when a conversation with a BFF years ago came to mind. One of my friends in a similar situation was told by her gynecologist to try olive oil as a lubricant, instead of the store-bought versions.

Hmmmm…ya think?!?!

Was our trusted Astroglide to blame for the past two years of BURN?

I didn’t want to get mine and hubby’s hopes up again. But at this point, we had nothing to lose and everything to gain. So….with great trepidation, hubby and I made the switch. We brought the olive oil from the kitchen to the bedroom and I’m happy to report we’ve been cooking up burn-free banging ever since.

The case of the angry bird….SOLVED!

Who knew…olive oil??? It’s not only heart healthy in the kitchen and great for amazing face and body at-home spa treatments; you can use it to make tasty taco salads in the bedroom as well. This stuff’s gold!

Picked up some EXTRA VIRGIN just for hubby!

What’s your favorite bedroom lubricant? Had you ever heard of using olive oil when you get between the sheets? What other amazing things do you use olive oil for? Come on…share the wealth….

More blog deliciousness here:

How can people continue to drink and drive after hearing these stories?

You may have seen on Facebook or in the news the deeply tragic story about a fatal crash that killed a Calgary woman Sunday August 12, 2012.

Kelli-Jo Smith, 38, died after the Ford pickup her husband was driving was hit by a Mercedes about 3:15 am Sunday. What makes the already tragic story even more gut wrenching (as if it could be) is that Kelli-Jo and her husband were actually acting as sober, designated drivers for a very responsible wedding crew who called on them for their assistance.

The best man in the wedding, after drowning a few drinks to give him the courage to make his speech, made the smart choice and opted not to drive impaired. He called his uncle (who had always gladly taken calls in the middle of the night to be a DD) and his stepfather to drive a handful of people home who had been drinking.

After driving everyone home and visiting with a few friends, he and his wife (who had just celebrated their second wedding anniversary) were headed home themselves when their Ford F150 was t-boned by a Mercedes-Benz sedan. The truck spun and struck a large power pole and both Kelli-Jo and her husband, Sean, were thrown from the vehicle.

Reports state that when Sean gained consciousness, he heard his wife cry out and crawled 70 meters to hold her in his arms and say good-bye as she passed away.

Is that not the saddest thing you’ve ever heard? And so senseless! I have tears burning in my eyes.

Sean himself suffered multiple injuries including hand, ankle and spine fractures and severe road rash and is still in hospital while the 27-year-old male driver of the Mercedes sustained minor injuries…and was released on bail not 2 days after the crash.

Makes me sick.

The impaired driver faces charges of impaired driving causing death, impaired driving causing bodily harm, and refusing to provide a breath sample.

I’ll be continuing to follow this case.

This comes not ONE WEEK after a 19-year-old impaired driver killed 49-year-old Jayantha Wijeratne and his 16-year-old daughter, Eleesha, in Toronto. Antonette, Jayantha’s wife, was rushed to hospital with life-threatening injuries.

According to one news report, the family was returning from a 5-day vacation in Florida. Eleesha’s 19-old-brother, Brian, who wasn’t with the family when the crash happened, was informed about the death of his father and sister by two police officers. He then had to tell his mother, in critical condition, that her daughter and husband were dead.

Can you imagine? My heart breaks for these families. Such senseless devastation!

You can see an interview between Sun News’ Charles Adler and Brian Wijeratne on what’s happened to his family. Charles asks the question “are our drunk driving laws tough enough?” Brian responded with a sentiment I share. It feels like people don’t view drunk driving causing death as much, certainly not murder. It’s like impaired drivers who kill aren’t considered killers because they were drunk and suddenly that becomes an “excuse” or makes them less accountable for their choices and actions.

I agree with Brian. And I think if you choose to drive drunk, that should be considered intent to kill and it should be treated like premeditated murder. But I realize, I am slightly bias.

I leave you with this…Rethink Impaired Driving!

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What do you think? Is impaired driving causing death murder or do you think that because the driver was under the influence, they weren’t in their “right” frame of mind and therefore it’s good that it’s treated like a lesser offence? What do you think needs to change so that impaired driving stops? Is it laws, policies, education or a combination of all three? Or do you think as long as there is alcohol, there will be drunk drivers?

On August 1, 2009, my beautiful mother-in-law’s life was cut tragically short by an impaired driver and my stepson’s life changed forever. In honor of Donna and Jordan Kennie, please don’t drink and drive. Impaired driving is 100% preventable. Think about it.

Support MADD Canada and follow them on Facebook, Twitter (@maddcanada), YouTube, and on the Web.

More blog deliciousness here:

Urban Word Wednesday: Panty Anthem

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Let the panty party continue! After yesterday’s post with underwear a deux, today’s Urban Word keeps the things in full swing as we celebrate of national underwear day (NUD). After you leave here, make sure you keep rocking out with Jenny Hansen. She’s talking panty parades and UNDIE SHOOTERS (need I say more???). She’s also got the dirt on an undie pop-up party with FreshPair (the fahhhbulous peeps that started NUD) in NYC August 22-23, 2012 (never have I wished I was in NYC more).

So….lets get down to urban word business!

Panty Anthem: a song that makes people want to take their panties off.

Examples Of Use:

Hubby and I were at the grocery store last night picking up a few things for the week. We were in the vegetable aisle checking out the lettuce when we had the following conversation.

Me: did you see mine and Jenny’s blog posts today? We are doing a belated celebration of national underwear day which was on August 5.

Hubby: I can’t believe you two missed THAT. But yeah, I saw the vibrating panties. I am getting you a pair for Christmas and we are so doing some kind of James Bond type vlog with them.

Me: nice. That sounds like super duper fun! Maybe I could wear them to the gym and finally have an assisted coregasm. What did you think of the fundies? Would you try a pair with me?

Hubby: I just broke 3 bills this week sweetheart. If you and I tried to slip into a pair of those we’d look like a monkey trying to fawk a football.

*I feigned disappointment – we definitely had people’s attention then*

Me: You know what they say, trying is half the fun. Wait a minute…

*I perk my head up towards the ceiling to hear the radio better*

Me: OMG I LOVE this song! It’s totally MY panty anthem?

Hubby: a panty anthem?

Me: you know…it’s so good it’s making me want to take my panties off!

*Hubby drops the lettuce and grabs my hand*

Hubby: come on, we can find the station in the car!

This is my panty anthem:

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What’s yours? Come on…share the wealth…

More blog deliciousness here:

Celebrate national underwear day with a panty party for two

I can’t believe both Jenny and I missed that it was National Underwear Day (NUD) on August 5, 2012. Alas, all is not lost. Jenny gathered the troops and we are going to do some panty partying like there’s no tomorrow. She kicked things off with a little belated NUD shindig with 8 hilarious undie facts and today, she took it to a whole new level with a post on VIBRATING panties. I gotta be honest. I think I want a pair!

Well dust off your tiaras and whip out the feather boas, it’s time to rock the panty party with Fundies; the underwear built for two!

They may look like unsuspecting plain old cotton undies but these super-sized, four-legged banging briefs will have you and your partner setting the sheets on fire.

No arsenal of erotica is complete without a pair.

Not to mention, the versatility. You and your partner can wear the briefs front to front or back to front depending on personal preference and favorite position.

My concern is mine and hubby’s propensity towards clumsiness. It’d definitely be interesting trying to maneuver into these orgasmic undies. I pray they are made with lots of spandex. Albeit, getting IN them would be half the frisky fun. I am not sure we could do it and stay vertical but hey, it’s all about getting horizontal, right?!?! It’s getting back OUT?!? Let me just say, I’d be keeping a pair of scissors handy for an easy exit.

Any Fundie fun to share? What’s the wackiest underwear adventure you’ve ever attempted? Think you’ll add these to your boudoir box of love? How are you celebrating national underwear day? Come on…share the wealth…

It’s Twisted Tuesday and that means it’s time to enjoy a smile, giggle or laugh…here’s hoping I’ve provided it in spades…enjoy!

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