The power of social media blows my mind

Hubby and I with our I Promise Campaign bracelets. We wear em’ loud and proud! Click on the picture to be taken to my post about the campaign with deets on how you can get your uber cool bracelet and support the cause!

The power of social media truly blows my mind. Amber West wrote about using social media for good here and here and it’s not like I didn’t believe her. I know it’s true. But I’ve had the opportunity to experience it in a real and profound way myself as of late.

As you know, this Saturday Hubby and I will be joining thousands of Canadians in the fight to end impaired driving by participating in MADD Canada’s annual Strides for Change walk-a-thon. The 5 km walk supports MADD Canada Chapters and Community Leaders in their efforts to educate and create awareness about the dangers of impaired driving as well as help victims in their community. Uberlicious or WHAT?!

So far, Hubby and I have raised close to $600 (that I know of…there could be more online donations that people didn’t even TELL me about…) A huge amount of that support came from my new-found blogging and writing family. Your generosity and support has been simply outstanding. Most of you I’ve never met face-to-face and yet…you are there week in and week out reading my Friday’s post, sharing an encouraging comment, cheering from the side lines in spirit, ReTweeting my efforts out into the blogosphere and twitterverse…and some even donating your hard-earned cash towards our walk-a-thon. It blows my mind! It leaves me speechless (ok…maybe not quite speechless but you get the drift).

You guys humble me. You honor me. And your support and love touches me deeply. We’ve really become quite a little family, haven’t we?! I had no idea I would achieve this level of friendship and family when I put the pen to this virtual paper nearly two years ago.

All that to say, y’all FREAKING ROCK my world!!! Thank you…each of you…for being YOU because you are truly a blessing in my life and I can’t ever put into words adequately how much you all mean to me. Seriously. Coolest freaking people on the planet!

I can’t WAIT to see what the next year brings…squeee!!!

If you want to donate to Hubby and mine’s Strides for Change walk-a-thon, there’s still time (no pressure!!!!)

  1. If you are located in either Fredericton or Saint John, NB, fire me an email (Natalie at nataliehartford dot com) and I’ll make arrangements to pick up your pledge.
  2. You can send us a pledge via an email money transfer (if bank supports that option) to my email Natalie at nataliehartford dot com.
  3. Email me your intentions and follow-up with a cheque via snail mail (yip, there’s still such a thing). I can cover your cash for Saturday knowing the cheque’s on its way.
  4. Make an online donation via MADD Canada’s secure website here and put Hartford in the “I want to make a donation in support of the following Strides for Change participant” box. Be sure to send me an email and let me know you’ve made a donation because MADD Canada won’t be able to tell me donation amounts submitted this way until after the walk.

And if a financial pledge isn’t your thing that is totally cool. Seriously. Just knowing you guys are behind me every step of the way makes all the difference in the world!

Oh and one more thing (God help me)…stay tuned for Monday’s post. It’s that time of the month again…no…not Aunt Flo…but something equally as distressing (just teasing Hubby). It’s HUBBY’S CORNER time and he’s delving into some of our marital bliss fun. You won’t want to miss it!

How has social media and/or blogging changed your world? What positive experiences have touched you? I’d love to hear…

On August 1, 2009, my beautiful mother-in-law’s life was cut tragically short by an impaired driver and my stepson’s life changed forever. In honor of Donna and Jordan Kennie, please don’t drink and drive. Impaired driving is 100% preventable. Think about it.

Support MADD Canada and follow them on Facebook, Twitter (@maddcanada), YouTube, and on the Web.

More blog deliciousness here:

Urban Word Wednesday: Clam Burger

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Clam Burger: name given to the vagina as it sometimes resembles a clam in a burger shape.

Examples Of Use:

Hubby and I were at the camp last weekend. On Friday night we watched the movie My Best Friend’s Girl starring Kate Hudson, Dane Cook and Jason Biggs. Hilarious. Definitely rent it if you haven’t seen it before.

That’s where I learned about the clam burger.

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Of course, this prompted hubby to spend the last week parading questions about my clam burger all over town; at the drugstore, grocery shopping, new shirt shopping, at the movies, when we get home, while BBQing….

Hubby: how’s your clam burger today?

Hubby: what’s your clam burger saying today?

Hubby: does your clam burger have a message for me today?

Hubby: is your clam burger going to come out to play tonight?

Hubby: does the little clam burger miss me?

Hubby: can I give your clam burger a little treat tonight?

Hubby: is your clam burger in need of a poke?

Hubby: have you been listening to your clam burger lately?

Trust me. We’ve been raising eyebrows all over town this week! LOL!

Does your partner have any cute nicknames for your clam burger? Come on…share the wealth…

More blog deliciousness here:

  • ROFL – I have a few people I am totally sending to the Piper Bayard and Holmes’ Camp Cheerful. Oh yes…you know who you are!
  • LOVED Julie Winn’s post on having a meticulous gardener as a neighbor. ROFL!!! I can only imagine!

Rocking the rag with reusable cups

Disclaimer: To my male readers, I apologize but this post isn’t for you. Dang. Although you might want to pass it along to your wife, sisters or female friends.

Ladies, are you sick of fearing “the string” peaking out when wearing swimwear when on your period? Or maybe you are fed up with avoiding swimwear all together? What about the clogged toilet scares or the dirty looks from the septic guy? Or how about the shame of shunning your thongs, g-strings and c-strings for famine undies during that time of the month? Or maybe you are like me and sick of the tactical tampon carrying techniques we have to employ? Most of the time, I feel like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible sneaking to the bathroom with my arsenal of period protection gear?

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Well NO MORE!

Move over tampons, back off pads….HELLO DivaCup!

The DivaCup is a non-absorbent cup that you insert into your hooha during your menstrual cycle to collect the flow. It can be worn for up to 12 hours before emptying, washing and reinserting although for heavier flows, one may need to empty more often.

Shut UP!?!?!?! I know!!

But…how do I get it in there…and then BACK OUT?!?!?!

According to the DivaCup website, to insert you simply fold it in half twice and with your vajayjay relaxed (cause mine is always super mellow and relaxed when inserting an object), you push the curved edge into the opening. It has little holes around the top edge to aid in suction. Hmmmm….

To remove, you pull gently on the stem until you reach the base of the cup at which point you pinch to release the seal and continue to pull down. They claim the “contents” shouldn’t spill and you simply pour them into the toilet, wash, and reinsert. You are good to go for another 12 hours.

Now…I gotta tell you. I wasn’t really sold on the product the first time I read about it. Ok, it’s cool. I knew I’d definitely blog about it but BUY it and TRY it? Hmmmm…not so sure…

That was until I met someone, in person, who uses it and LOVES it! We were at a girls-only party a few weeks ago and after much wine, the topic of Aunt Flo came up (do not ask me how…) This friend of mine SWEARS by the DivaCup and said she’s never going back to tampons or pads ever again. She said it’s soft and smooth and when inserted properly does not leak. And she said it’s COMFY! MORE comfortable than a tampon. So comfortable, she said she forgets it’s there entirely.

Best yet, she said you’d be surprised how “easy in and easy out” the thing is. After the first time or two, when you get more used to it, she said it takes all but 2 seconds to pop it in. And it’s worn low in the vagina so it’s not difficult to “find”. Removal was a bit trickier but she said that once you get the hang of it, it’s a snap. Her advice; be sure to use the middle finger and DON’T PANIC.

DivaCup makers say it can be worn during all activities like traveling, running, biking, camping, swimming, diving, yoga, extreme sports and more. About the only sport you can’t do when wearing the DivaCup is have sex.

This would be great for me considering our high propensity to engage in redneck activities that usually involve a lot of banging, bumping, and bouncing. I don’t know how many times after hitting a wallop of a washout in the Rhino that I’ve said to hubby “I feel like my tampon just catapulted up my vag and into my throat…” NOT FUN!

Not to mention the “Green” factor here, which is a total double whammy. Whammy #1) think about the billions of tampons and pads that are dumped into our environment each year. Gross. Whammy #2) think of the green staying in my POCKET not having to buy an arsenal of feminine products each month!

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The DivaCup gets great product reviews all over YouTube. I found quite an extensive one:

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Check out the DivaCup’s YouTube channel for more videos.

And this revolutionary period product ain’t new ladies. Can you believe the menstrual cup has been around since the 1930’s?

Back in the day, they were made from rubber latex and millions were sold. However, over the years companies shut down and the cups got hard to find. A mother in search of the product actually ended up reintroducing the menstrual cup back to the world about 15 years ago. And in 2003, her and her daughter revamped the rubber/latex version to the current DivaCup, which is made from soft, top-quality silicone. It’s patent-pending and ISO certified.

Why am I only hearing about this fabulousness now?!?! I’m going to have to go have a chat with my mother.

Have you heard of and/or tried the DivaCup or a menstrual cup? Does it work? Good or bad? Would you try one? Come on ladies…share the wealth…

It’s Twisted Tuesday and that means it’s time to enjoy a smile, giggle or laugh…here’s hoping I’ve provided it in spades…enjoy!

More blog deliciousness here:

Breaking in spring with fling and flare

As May comes to a close, Hubby and I have been diligently celebrating our most revered month. It’s a month of celebration and glory; a month of happiness; a month of pure JOY; and a month of skipping, hand-in-hand through the tulips. Everything looks brighter, better, more jubilant in May.

Why do we love May so much?

Gardening starts? Nope

Spring is in the air? Nope

Flowers and trees are in bloom? Lovely…but that’s not it….

BBQ season begins? Well…that is a definite bonus but…nope

Golf? Ok, well that is quite yummy!!!! But no…

May 1st marks the official start of outdoor sex season (OSS). Yeahhhhh!!!!

That’s right folks. It’s time to get your groove on in the big bad outdoors. And today, I’m going to share with you some tips and tricks that I’ve tried and tested (the things I do for my readers…) to make sure you get the most out of this year’s OSS!

Location Location Location

I can’t say it enough. It’s true in real estate and it’s true for OSS. You gotta get the right spot. First, you must be on the same page as to your goals. Is it the risk of getting caught that gets you fired up or do you prefer a little privacy? By making sure you are the same page, you and your partner can find the perfect local.

For those exhibitionist types, why not try a quiet park at dusk or a dark alley late at night. Perhaps an evening beach walk to cool off (and heat up), or slip away from the party to find a quiet spot just in the tree line.

If you’d prefer to enjoy OSS without the fear of public observation or police intervention, try the rooftop of your apartment building or perhaps take a little off-trail exploration on your next hiking trip. Why not your own backyard (hubby and I have a very private back deck)? No privacy…no problem! You can make a private area in your backyard with the careful placement of a BBQ, some chairs and a beach umbrella. Get creative people.

Planning for spontaneity = tons of fun

Although you want your OSS to be fun and spontaneous, a little planning will ensure things go smoothly. Make sure to have OSS kits in all the key places; the truck, the camp, the RV, the Rhino etc. You get the idea. OSS kits should contain sunblock, bug spray, lube, toilet paper, baby wipes and hand sanitizer. I also highly recommend keeping small travel blankets here and there since they come in mighty handy for OSS. Nothing kills the mood more than sand in all the wrong places or a burn from a hot car hood.

The right clothing makes all the difference

For those interludes that are more private, clothing is less of an issue since there’s nothing quite as liberating as frolicking totally buck in the bush. But for those outdoor escapades that might be a wee bit more risky (the beach in the DR, for example), wearing the right apparel will only enhance your overall experience. You want to wear items that grants access that can be hidden just as quickly as shown. For men, it’s less of an issue but for the ladies, try a flowing dress to hide a multitude of sins. Apparel that has stretch is your new BFF so skirts with a little bit of Spandex work wonderfully.

There you have it people, my tried, tested and true tips and tricks to getting your nasty on in the great outdoors. OSS only lasts so long so get out there and get busy!

What’s your take on outdoor sex season? Are you game or do you turn your nose up at such ideas? Any tips and tricks to share with my readers who dare to try it? What’s your favorite or craziest OSS spot? Come on…share the wealth…

More blog deliciousness here:

MADD Canada 2012-2013 School Assembly Program is now booking

According to MADD Canada, road crashes continue to be the number one cause of death among young people in Canada and alcohol is a factor in nearly 45% of those crashes. How desperately sad is that?

In an effort to stop impaired driving among teens, MADD Canada offers an annual school assembly programs that is designed to communicate specifically with young people; on their level and in their language. The program is given across Canada to more than 1 million students from Grades 7 through 12. It presents students with solid information and best practices in a style that we all hope will encourage them to make the decision to drive sober and to never get in the car with someone they suspect has been drinking.

This year, hubby and I were super-duper proud of The Dude when he was approached by MADD Canada to take part in the 2012-2013 video and agreed. I wrote about here. I cannot imagine how difficult it was for him to share such horrific details about his experience but…he did. And I have no doubt his efforts, and those of everyone involved in the production, will save lives.

This year’s video, entitled Long Weekend, is a dramatization that highlights the devastating consequences when a teen decides to drive impaired after partying at a summer cottage. It ends with testimonials from real-life victims, like The Dude, who share their experience.

Check out this highlight:

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Watching the highlight, I was blown away by the quality of the production. It’s no silly video that is going to have teens giggling from the poor acting and bad lighting. This is obviously a production that’s had a lot of thought, time, energy and fund invested in it.

MADD Canada is currently taking bookings for its upcoming School Assembly Program. For more information, visit the website.

What do you think? Powerful? Think it’ll strike a chord with teens? Think it speaks to them in their language?

In 2009, my beautiful mother-in-law’s life was cut tragically short by an impaired driver and my stepson’s life changed forever. In honor of Donna and Jordan Kennie, please don’t drink and drive. Impaired driving is 100% preventable. Think about it.

Support MADD Canada and follow them on Facebook, Twitter (@maddcanada), YouTube, and on the Web.

More blog deliciousness here:

Urban Word Wednesday: Shit Show

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Shit Show: A description of an event or situation which is characterized by a ridiculously inordinate amount of frenetic activity, disorganization and chaos to an absurd degree. A shit show is often associated with extreme ineptitude/incompetence and or sudden and unexpected failure.

Examples Of Use:

Hubby and I were waiting in line to get my favorite butter pecan latte last week; much to the amusement of the barista.

Hubby: so how was last night’s event?!?!??

Me: a total shit show! Honestly, I’ve never seen anything quite like it. The right hand had no idea what the left hand was doing. Registration was a mess. Everything started late. The main speaker didn’t even show. Complete and utter shit show! The shit show of all shit shows! The magna of all shit shows! A total waste of my time.

Hubby: you really need to learn how to express yourself better…you are so reserved and unfeeling…I totally didn’t get the true “sense” of your emotions here! 

*winks at the barista who is in a fit of giggles at this point*

Me: I know…I am way to self-contained. I need to learn to let go, open up, and express how I really feel! But seriously…it was that freaking bad! Lesson learned. I won’t attend one of their events again.

Hubby: always good to know.

Ever attend a real shit show? Or worse, ever organize a shit show? An event that was jaw-droppingly disorganized, chaotic and insane? Come on…share the wealth…

More blog deliciousness here:

Remote control fun for the pool

Ok, so I don’t own a pool or a hot tub but man…when I saw the remote control and snack float all I could think is THAT would be perfect for my “someday” pool parties!!!

I can picture it now….hubby loading drinks and there I can be, sunning myself, relaxing pool side while at the SAME time being the world’s best pool party hostess delivering refreshments to my guests from the comfort of my lounger.

This bad boy will let me send 5 floating deliciously divine drinks AND some munchies around the water via remote control. With a simple push of the button, my guests can let their cares drift away maxin’ and relaxin’ in the pool and when the remote control snack float sputters by, they can take their refill and leave their empty aboard.

Talk about the hostess with the mostest!

And…imagine the fun I can have bringing drinks within inches of their grasping little hands only to whisk them away. Squeeee…gotta keep guests on their toes!

The cost of this floating fabulousness is about $75.99 US (plus shipping) and is a must have for anyone planning a pool party this summer. At least until the R2D2 drink waiter gets created.

What pool gadgets catch your attention? Think you’d enjoy this remote control bad boy?

It’s Twisted Tuesday and that means it’s time to enjoy a smile, giggle or laugh…here’s hoping I’ve provided it in spades…enjoy!

More blog deliciousness here:

What do your shoes say about you?

I think clothes have a big impact on a person’s first impression about who we are. They are a very in-your-face, visual statement. And whether right or wrong, people likely make assumptions about who we are based on their interpretation of our clothing. Am I a girlie girl, comfort is key, designer all the way baby, hiking is my thing, or tomboy kind of gal. Does she dress like me? Do I wish I dressed like her? Does she dress like my brother?

So what about our shoes? I mean, don’t they speak volumes as well? I know I don’t always do a close inspection but I can say that a nice pair of shoes always catch my eye (same with a fab purse but we’ll dive into that another time).

So I did a little research to see what my shoes say about me and you know what? Most of it was pretty bang on. I turned to two sources, millionlooks.com and sulekha.com, for the shoe personality deets.

Pumps & Comfies – 40% wear rate

At my day job, where I put in about 40 hours a week, I usually wear comfortable pumps or wedges. If we have a swanky event or an important meeting etc, I might dress it up but for the most part, comfort is key.

What they say about me?

Comfortable sexiness. Women who wear wedge shoes are usually straightforward, confident and love power. However, when it comes to decision-making they tend to hesitate. In relationships they seek for reliability and trust. The person who wears platform shoes relays the same confidence and sexiness as stilettos, but under a more practical and sure-footed nature. It also denotes ambition and determination.

Dead on! I definitely have confidence (not so sure about the love power thing), sexiness, practical, ambition and determination. Amen to that. And I do hesitate when making decisions.

Flats (or close to flat) – 30% wear rate (it’d be higher IF our summers were longer)

I know, I know, you’ll all be stunned but I do own a number of flats or close to flat flats. I love my flip-flops, low-heeled sandals, Birkenstocks, and my dreadfully ugly, yet wonderfully comfortable, loafers (even hubby said UGH when I bought them). These are what I wear to the mall, to go shopping, when hitting a movie, or just touring around.

What they say about me?

Dandy-girl. If you like loafers and Oxford shoes you belong to a group of women who are undemonstrative and prefer hiding their feelings even if their souls are in flames. Flats-lovers are usually sweet, friendly and a little boring. Women who like flats are usually great fashionistas who are fond of wearing new clothes.

The flat shoe/sandal wearer is steady and grounded in life. This person is often energetic; high paced, and exudes a zest for experiencing life to the fullest. On the other hand, flip-flops symbolize a youthful, mellow, and money-conscious, person. While maybe considered a bit unpolished at times, the flip-flop bearer is easy to please, and even easier to get along with.

Ok, so I am soooo not undemonstrative nor do I hide my feelings while my soul is burned in flames. LOL! And I don’t think I am even close to boring. And I know a ton of “flat” wearers who would never be classified as boring so that’s definitely way off the mark! But….I would consider myself a great fashionista, LOVE LOVE LOVE new clothes and HELL yes I am easy to please and get along with (SHUT UP Hubby!!)!

Stilettos – 15% wear rate

I know…shocking I don’t wear them more often, eh?! You already know I love anything that sparkles so I definitely have more than my fair share of stunning stilettos with oodles of bling. But I don’t wear them every single day. I find them comfortable in a wear-for-couple-hours kind of way. But these aren’t shoes I could do for 8 or 10 hours in while at work. These are the shoes I break out when we head out on the town, dancing, or on vacation.

What they say about me?

Stiletto as a weapon. If you love stilettos you are most likely a vivid and extraordinary person who longs for attention. You can be capricious and a bit spoiled but you always get what you want. You are confident about your powers and sex appeal. However, some people take you as a silly and shallow girl.

The stiletto, i.e., height is often associated with power, self-indulgence, and pride. It signifies that its wearer is assertive of their sexuality and personality and is not afraid to show it. The stiletto demands attention, and the more flashy it appears, the more pain it may inflict, as it walks over whoever or whatever stands in the way of getting what it wants.

The first paragraph is likely quite bang on although I don’t think people take me as silly and shallow but hey, maybe when I am stilettos, they do?!?! On a good note, in regards to paragraph 2, I don’t own many super HIGH stilettos. Most of mine range from 2 to 3.5 inches. I am not a 5-inch stiletto-wearing crazy person! And a lot of mine are somewhat platform making them even LESS high to my feet.

Boots – 10% wear rate

I have a slight obsession with boots; tall, low, stiletto, wedge, open-toe – you name it, I love them all. I could happily fill my closet with them delightful treasures. That being said, most of my fancy books only get brought out for special occasions, while the more comfy versions (wedge or low heeled) get paired up with jeans for just about any occasion – shopping, dinner with friends etc. So the wear rate could be a bit higher.

What they say about me?

Biker-style queen. You are reserved and a bit egocentric. You don’t trust people and prefer doing everything yourself. But at the same time you are smart and sensitive and often worry about your relations with other people. You get sincerely surprised with rudeness and inadequate behavior.

OMG hubby is going to read this and say I should be wearing boots 90% of the time – egocentric, prefer doing everything myself?!?! YIP!! But on the positive, I am smart and sensitive at the same time.

Sneakers – 5% wear rate

I am not a huge sneaker wearing girl. This is probably because I am not overly athletic but I do own a pair or two for going for walk, sporting stuff, or for heading out to the camp.

What they say about me?

Tomboy. Girls who have a weak point about sporty footwear are normally creative and sociable. They love traveling and feel extremely bored when routine makes them stay at the same place for long. You need to always be among people who love and respect you. The sneaker wearer is hip, youthful, playful and busy.

Ok…I’ll take that. Maybe I need to wear these more often!

So let’s summarize. Basically my shoes say that:

At work during the day, I am comfortable sexiness. I am straightforward, confident and love power but struggle with making decisions.

At home and at play, I am, for the most part, a dandy-girl big into fashion and wearing new clothes. I prefer stability and security to being a big risk taker. I am energetic; high paced, and exude a zest for experiencing life to the fullest.

When I am going out on the town or vacation, that’s when my vivid and extraordinary side comes out to play; always longing for attention. I am confident about my powers and sex appeal and I want to be unique and make a statement everywhere I go.

But on the flip side, I can also be a bit of a biker chick/tomboy. I get a little egocentric and prefer doing everything myself. I get bored and want to go go go! I invest in my relationship with others.

What do you think? Is the shoe/personality analysis dead on? Do the descriptions match your personality and style? What do your shoes say about you?

More blog deliciousness here:

Breathalyzers in bars ~ what’s your vote?

I recently read a news piece on CBC about a Moncton businessman hoping to install breathalyzer machines in bars and nightclubs across the Maritimes. The man said he believed that the coin-operated machines could save lives because they’d educate customers and make them more aware (and thereby, hopefully more responsible for their actions).

He already has 2 in a club in Moncton. For $2, a person can get a blood alcohol content reading. Ideally if a person got a reading that was near or above the legal limit, they’d be less likely to take the chance and drive. The bar owner said that this type of things is very popular in Montreal and Toronto.

That being said, there’s always a flip side. A representative from CAA said in the article that people should be very careful relying on coin-operated breathalyzers because there’s no way to tell just how accurate they are. He said that people should take it as a clear indication that they shouldn’t drive if they felt the need to test themselves to begin with.

Hmmm…good point!

Reliability and liability. I know the police breathalyzers are maintained on a regular schedule to guarantee their reliability in a court of law. If I used one of these coin-operated machines and it said I was under the limit and then I drove, got stopped and blew over, I’d be pretty pissed!

In the article, an RCMP spokesperson said that people need to know that the only reading that counts is the one measured by police.

Touché!

Even still, I do think it’s a good thing. Especially if bar owners are willing to do some maintenance and care to ensure the machines are fairly accurate. I think anything that helps people take pause, for even a moment, to question whether they should drive is a step in the right direction. Maybe more often than not someone would decide it’s just not worth the risk.

I took part in the poll on CBC and was happy to see that (at that time) 72.85% (110 voters) agreed that bars should have coin-operated breathalyzers for patrons while only 27.15% (41 voters) disagreed.

What do you think?

The absolute best way to avoid risking blowing over is to commit to zero alcohol when you are driving.

Two years ago, my beautiful mother-in-law’s life was cut tragically short by an impaired driver and my stepson’s life changed forever. In honor of Donna and Jordan Kennie, please don’t drink and drive. Impaired driving is 100% preventable. Think about it.

Support MADD Canada and follow them on Facebook, Twitter (@maddcanada), YouTube, and on the Web.

More blog deliciousness here:

Urban Word Wednesday: Famine Underwear

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

I am sticking with the panty theme after yesterday’s post on the C string Thong.

Famine Underwear: The garments you wear during a shortage of underwear, when you haven’t done laundry in several weeks or months. Usually characterized by lack of elasticity, holes (usually large and awkwardly located), stains, and typically are at least 5-10 years old. In some cases soccer shorts, underwear of unknown origin, thongs, bathing suit bottoms, or ‘granny panties’ can be considered famine underwear, but do not necessarily meet the above criteria.

Examples Of Use:

Hubby and I were getting dressed for work the other morning when he totally busted me.

Hubby: WHAT is that you are wearing?!?!??

Me: what???

Hubby: those undies are like putting No Name Brand BBQ sauce on Grade A steak…a real shame!

Me: oh come on hubby! After a 2-week vacation of slinky and sexy I needed a break. I missed my famine underwear! Not to mention, there’s nothing better than famine undies when a gal is feeling all bloated and gross.

Hubby: I get the need for comfort but my god, can’t we toss those and buy you some newer ones that aren’t so…gray???

Me: but these ones are all broke in! It’s like they have morphed to my ass perfectly. They are custom famine underwear. I mean…you can’t just buy that kind of comfort and design. It takes years of wearing, washing, and general beating up to get true famine underwear.

Hubby: ok ok…I give! Keep the damn famine undies but just know…there is nothing sexy about that!

Me: I can live with that. Besides, trust me! You got your own whole compartment of famine underwear that I never say a word about! Rips and holes are just as unsexy as gray! Just sayin’…

Hubby: ….fair enough…

When do you break out your famine underwear? Does your significant other complain and threaten to toss them? Do you threaten to toss theirs? Come on…share the wealth…

More blog deliciousness here:

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