Urban Word Wednesday: Ambisextrous

Welcome to Urban Word Wednesday! New words, phrases, and sayings I am learning (and using in my day-to-day life) brought to you by ME…and the Urban Dictionary. You are gonna love these!

Ambisextrous: having the ability to masturbate successfully with both hands.

Examples Of Use:

Hubby and I were in the ice cream section of the grocery store picking up supplies for my birthday dessert.

Hubby: I discovered the neatest thing last night.

Me: really? What’s that?

Hubby: I am ambisextrous.

*weird looks from passerbys*

Me: what in God’s name is that?

Hubby: I can make my own pleasure palace with either hand!!! It used to be that if I used my left hand, it was like a stranger (which was fun and rocked in its own way) but I think I overused it and now…I am ambisextrous. Right, left, either, both; it’s all the same difference.

Me: well, that is a talent baby. I’m so proud.

Hubby: I know…sooo cool!

What do you think? Is ambisextrous a natural talent or a learned skill? Come on…share the wealth…

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Comments

  1. Natural talent or learned skill. I’ve never thought about it like that. Ok, I’ll go do some hands on research and get back to you on that. :)

  2. Oh wow! These posts need to come with a warning that says: Put down your coffee and swallow before reading! I cam close to covering my keyboard with a spray of coffee. That wouldn’t be fun to clean up (I’m guessing, it’s not like I actually clean). That was hilarious and not what I was guessing from the title. I was thinking it was either something like Metrosexual (which I don’t get) or the ability to enjoy multiple positions (you know, top vs. bottom and all). But I guess I don’t think from a man’s perspective very well. I would think that they’d be able to do it with either hand and while reading and chewing gum. But I could be very wrong.

  3. Hmmm… I’d say it’s a learned skill. Or a skill we deny ourselves until one day when we’re feeling uber-empowered, LOOK OUT! ROFL. These posts never cease to amaze or entertain, Natalie!

  4. Actually I was literally born ambidextrous. It’s paid off in sports. writing, and even when drawing a picture. So naturally I have an additional edge when it’s time for a little “entertainment.” Once I injured my hand boxing and had to have it all taped up for a month. I had to say goodbye to the right hand. What can I say? Breaking up is hard to do. Fortunately we got back together again.

  5. OMG. I’m laughing so hard right now.

  6. I am DYING with laughter right now and if I could turn red, I’d probably be an amazing shade of puce. PHENOMENAL.

  7. OK, but Hubby…a real man just uses BOTH hands, thereby becoming duosextrous! Or is it double-bextrous… Or simo-sextrous (portmanteau of simultaneous and sextrous)…

    Hmmmm…

  8. Oh my gosh! I can’t WAIT to read your novels, girlfriend. If your fiction dialogue is anything like your Urban Word Wednesday hubby/me dialogue, I will have to read lying on my back or I will fall down with laughter.

  9. I love the new addition to my vocabulary. I will see if the significant other has ever heard of this lovely new word…
    Lani

  10. Thank you so much for the blog love, Natalie!

  11. I turn red in the face just reading some of your posts. LOL The things you guys talk about, in public, no less! :D

  12. It was like a stranger? Ohmyheck. Hubby is too frikkin hilarious for words. With all the nookie you guys have, why does he need to be ambisextrous? Wait. I don’t really want to know. ;)

  13. I could learn from your husband, I think! LOL

    Subhan Zein

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